Burnt By The Sun
… and waiting for “The Big One”
Lounging by the pool today, I can’t help but feel the pain.
The pain of more soldiers lost, of seeing us handcuffed by American electrical whims, instead of taking care of business.
We’re waiting for Godot over here.
Maybe the Messiah, maybe a missile or two with a massive warhead to shake up the shit dynamic we’re stuck in.
Reactive mode.
What will Sinwar answer?
When will Nasrallah press launch?
And what kind of shit does Khamenei have in store for us?
The hell with them all.
They’re flying high, soon to crash back down to earth.
Ok, I fess up.
I’m also in pain because I burnt to a crisp on Friday.
We dug a BIG hole on the beach with the kids.
And I didn’t spray or put cream.
Idiot.
Totally unnecessary pain.
Completely avoidable result.
Strange for someone who’s usually so careful and risk-averse, health-wise.
Yet, here we are.
It hurts like a mother-fnacker to just lean back against the chaise lounger.
Cream, aloe vera, it’s all barely helped.
At least I slept half-decently last night.
Why did I do it?
Clearly, it’s not because I’m forgetful.
Somewhere in the back of my mind, I wanted to tan away skin that looked sickly.
Or maybe because being so rational for so long is unsustainable.
Even if we learn the story of Icarus early.
Even if we’ve been burned before.
Even MANY times.
Even sober adults who are (too) risk-averse.
We still sometimes fly too close, tan for too long, stay in the limelight for too long.
We know it will hurt - hurt like a bitch, indeed - but still do it.
Why is that, one wonders?
Are we wired for self-sabotage?
There’s a good case to be made for that.
Men, especially, have a self-destructive impulse, sometimes in the form of ambition, ego, addiction, even death.
Irrational! Absolutely.
The human psyche is CHOCK FULL of contradictions, as we learn from behavioral psychology.
When I started with the title of this newsletter, I naturally thought back to the eponymously titled movie by the brilliant sell-out of Russian cinema, Nikita Mikhalkov, the type to cozy up to the ruling class even while known intimately the rot, corruption and hypocrisy there.
Here’s the movie link, if you’re curious.
TLDR; a family man named Kotov on vacation in the country with his wife and daughter, a man who happens to be an old Bolshevik war hero, rides out to the field to stop tanks on maneuvers from trampling the local wheat harvest, using the pretext that he is Stalin’s close friend (close to the sun).
Next thing we know, his wife’s old lover arrives to secretly spy on Kotov, and eventually to bring him down.
As Stalin often did with both friend and foe.
Moral of the story? Friends are enemies and enemies must be kept as friends.
Little wonder, ex-Soviet people have such a hard time trusting others 🤷♂️.
But there’s more than meets the eye here.
Sure, we all get burned from time to time.
Self-inflicted or not isn’t always the point.
Some have a high tolerance for pain (entrepreneurs, for example).
Some of them want to use you, some of them want to be used by you. (per the Eyrythmics)
Not all burns are deadly.
Skin regenerates, as do we, in a sense.
Not if we burn too often or too harshly, but all the same.
Does it pay to be Icarus, by another name?
Can it be good to go BOLD, to say, F* the naysayers and doubters and really GO for it?
Well, that’s a hard NO if you’re fighting a dictatorial regime on your own (few to none of us are as worthy as Natan Sharansky, for example).
And quite often, a defiant YES when the socio-politico-economic system is structured to empower you (such as democratic capitalism, even with all its flaws).
Posterboy speaking here.
(Poster boy very fortunate to grow up in the U.S. after escaping Russia thanks to his Mom.)
If I had a dime for every time I ignored naysayers and doubters all around me, for every time I trampled conventional wisdom, didn’t have the right “education” or training or experience for a job and still did it with flying colors…
If I could monetize every time I learned the “hard way” and it actually helped me more than the conventional way, I would be a very rich man, indeed.
I’ll take the wisdom and the hard knocks any day.
At first, it was a matter of foolish pride.
Eventually, I got help wherever I could.
The Soviet mindset was a massive barrier to even asking for help, but I overcame it eventually.
Getting burned is never pleasant, don’t misunderstand me.
If you’re so stupid to think youth or experience will magically heal your wounds quickly, you’re also dangerously delusional.
You better damn well learn your lesson from each new line of burn, once and for all.
Or you may perish in the proverbial ashes.
But if you learn quickly, try again soon with undiminished enthusiasm, iterate quickly and efficiently, then get help from expert “firefighters” or “protective cream” experts, then you’re well on the way to success.
It’s often the last part that trips up very smart people - overconfidence in their own ability and judgment.
I would know, since I did much damage to my progress through self-sabotage in the past.
Don’t be “that guy” or “that girl.”
Know your limits.
And get some help!
LAST CHANCE TODAY to sign up for coaching with me at a CRAZY value:
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Join D., J., T., S and other readers and past clients who’ve already signed up :)
Last and perhaps most important rule:
AT LEAST DON’T BURN YOURSELF through willful ignorance or laziness.
Trust me, you will kick yourself later.
It will cost you MUCH more then to fix and catch up.
Stay safe, do great work and have a great and restful week ahead, my friends!